The Glass Jar: Why Quiet Leaders Must Schedule Their Priorities
- Rose Ung
- Mar 7
- 3 min read
We wear "busy-ness" like a badge of honor!
You know the feeling at the end of a long workday: you’ve replied to so many emails you’ve lost count, you sat through back-to-back meetings, and you’ve put out dozens of fires. You are exhausted. Your social battery is completely drained. But as you crash onto the bed, that sinking feeling hits your stomach: Did I actually accomplish anything today? Or did I just survive?
For introverted leaders, this cycle isn't just tiring—it’s dangerous. Our energy is a finite resource, and when we spend it all reacting to the "noise," we have nothing left for the "vital few" things that actually move the needle on our life’s blueprint.
In Episode 3 of the Quiet Leadership Lab, we’re exploring Stephen Covey’s Habit 3: Put First Things First.
The Exercise of Independent Will
If Habit 2 was the mental creation (the blueprint), then Habit 3 is the physical creation—the discipline to actually build the house, brick by brick, day by day.
Greg McKeown (author of 'this Essentialism') and Stephen Covey both agree that successful people have the habit of doing things that others don't like to do. They don't necessarily love the hard work, but their "disliking" is subordinate to the strength of their purpose. They have the "Independent Will" to say no to the trivial so they can say yes to the vital.
The Time Management Matrix: Identifying the "Introvert Killer"
To execute effectively, you have to understand where your time is actually going. Imagine your tasks divided into four quadrants:
Quadrant 1 (Crisis): Urgent and Important. Fires on a construction site, hospital visits, or legal threats. You have to do these, but if you live here, you burn out.
Quadrant 3 (The Deception): Urgent but Not Important. This is the Introvert Killer. It’s the constant phone ringing, the "quick" meetings that should have been emails, and the needy colleagues. It feels like work, but it doesn't build your blueprint.
Quadrant 4 (Waste): Not Urgent and Not Important. Doom-scrolling and mindless busy-work.
Quadrant 2 (The Magic): Not Urgent but Important. This is strategy, relationship building, planning your blueprint, and—for me—writing my romance novels.
The Big Rocks vs. The Sand
People often ask me how I manage to be a Project Director overseeing hundreds of millions of dollars, lead a small business, run this podcast, and write novels while being a mom to young kids.
The answer is: I don't fit it all in.
I choose what I drop. I use the "Glass Jar" metaphor:
Imagine your life is a glass jar. Your roles and identities—Mother, Project Director, Author, Quiet Leader—are Big Rocks. They are solid, weighty, and time-consuming. If you fill your jar with "sand" first (the emails, the trivial requests, the social noise), the rocks will never fit.
But if you put the Big Rocks in first—blocking out unmovable time for your writing, your family, and your strategy—the "sand" of the world will naturally trickle through the gaps. You can fit the noise around the vital, but you can never fit the vital around the noise.
How to Apply Habit 3: Schedule Your Priorities
Don't prioritize your schedule; schedule your priorities.
Identify Your Big Rocks: What are the key actions needed for your identities this week?
Be Inflexible with the Block: Mark out the time in your calendar for your Big Rocks and treat it as unmovable. Put your work in "silent mode."
Practice the Hardest Word: To protect your Quadrant 2 time, you must say "no." It feels selfish at first, but if you don't fill your own cup, you have nothing to pour for your team or your family.
The Quiet Challenge: Reclaim One Hour
Success doesn't have to be loud, but it does have to be disciplined.
This week, look at your calendar and find one hour currently filled with "sand"—maybe a meeting you don't need to attend or an hour you usually spend doom-scrolling.
Cancel it. Replace it with a Big Rock. Go for a walk, read a book, or work on your strategy.
Reclaim your time, because if you don't, someone else will.
Rose Ung is a project director and business consultant helping introverts master leadership, wealth, and family—quietly and on their own terms. Catch the full discussion on the Quiet Leadership Lab podcast.
Comments